Goodbye
by kakkujapojat
Summary: Mello and Matt's final goodbye. -Rated T for mild BL- Mostly a fluff.


**This is a one-shot I thought of sort of randomly... My ideas really come out of nowhere. However I would like to think _Enacchi_****, whose fanfic "oOoYoushaoOo****" inspired this! :) **

**All the same, it's my fourth one-shot so hopefully it's better than my previous ones...?**

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さよなら

"GOODBYE"

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Matt stared across the room, hardly daring to believe that he was there – sitting across from him in his own apartment. After four years of not seeing him, here he was. The site of the other boy made his heart race slightly, but he kept up his calm composure as he watched the other boy's movements carefully, as though waiting for it to be a trick of the light.

The blond-headed boy smiled at him, clearly undisturbed by the awkwardness of this situation. Slowly, he stood up from the armrest of the sofa and walked over to sit down beside Matt, his hand gently resting over the other boy's. "It's been a long time, hasn't it?" he said, looking straight at Matt, even though the other boy had long since averted his gaze.

"Yeah, it has. ...why didn't you come and find me?" Matt said, embarrassed by how childish and hurt his voice sounded.

Mello's smile faded into a small frown. "I'm sorry. I just didn't want to drag you into whatever mess I ended up starting," he replied. "It was better if I didn't take you with me."

"But I _wanted_ to go with you," Matt said. "When you left, you didn't say anything. You could have at least said goodbye."

"I know. I was selfish; I knew that if I stopped to tell you goodbye, that I could never bring myself to go." Mello looked down at the floor, ashamed of himself. "I regretted it every day of my life."

"Why did you wait so long to come find me?" Matt asked.

"I wanted to make sure it was safe. If Kira, or someone else was watching me – they'd obviously try and hurt you if they knew you were important to me, Matt."

"But...if you knew where I was, couldn't you have called, or...something?" His eyes looked at Mello accusingly, but full of long built-up sadness as well.

"I'm sorry," Mello repeated, giving Matt's hand a small stroke. "I didn't want to risk it."

"It's been four years..." Matt said. "Four years with no word from you, and you just show up here? How did you think I'd react?"

"I don't know," Mello responded softly, his eyes still locked on the brownish carpet of the apartment's interior. "I wanted to see you."

"And you haven't wanted to see me for the past four years?" Matt said, a slight bit of heat rising in his voice.

"Of course I have." Mello's voice remained calm, as he looked back at Matt, his brilliant azul eyes boring into the other boy's. "But I didn't want you to become involved in this. I knew you'd follow me in whatever I did, so I chose to leave you out for your own safety."

"But I wouldn't care about my own safety, if I could've been with you all that time!" Matt protested.

"I know that. And that's precisely why I couldn't. Because I knew you wouldn't care. But _I _care, Matt. And that's why I didn't tell you where I was going." Mello reached up a hand and gently touched Matt's face.

Even though he tried to stay mad, Matt's anger dissipated instantly at Mello's soft touch. He could never stay angry with him. His own hand found it's way up to his face, and closed around Mello's. "I missed you," he said, his voice becoming slightly choked with tears.

"I missed you, too." Mello smiled again, and tentatively placed a kiss on Matt's lips, squeezing the other boy's hand ever so gently. As he slowly pulled away, Mello stared into his eyes with a pained expression. "Matt, I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?"

"For all those times at the orphanage, pushing you around and treating you like dirt. Getting you in all that trouble simply because you followed me. I'm sorry for leaving you behind, and for never treating you the way that I should have. I..." Mello attempted to continue on with more, but Matt gently put a finger to his lips to silence him.

"I forgive you, Mello. I've always forgiven you; I don't care what you do to me, I still love you."

Mello smiled, and tears slowly began to streak down his face, dripping onto his and Matt's hands. "Thank you, Matt..." his voice was tainted with relief. "All this time, I've been worried...scared that you wouldn't forgive me. After the way I treated you, it's obvious that that's what I deserved."

"I could never hate you, Mello," Matt said gently, kissing him again – longer this time.

"That's really good to know." More tears slid down Mello's face. "But I have to go now"

"What?"

"I can't stay, I'm sorry." Mello gave him a final gentle kiss, and stood up from the chair. "I just came because I wanted to tell you goodbye. I didn't want to leave without seeing you one more time."

"Mello, what do you mean?"

"I'm sorry, Matt. I'll always be here for you, if you ever need me. Don't ever forget that, alright?"

Although Matt's mind was swimming with questions, he nodded.

_Mello is just leaving me again..._

Mello smiled and walked to the doorway, slowly opening the door before turning back to Matt. "Ich liebe dich," he said.

Although his eyes were filled to the brim with tears, Matt's face broke into a smile at the words they had always spoken to each other throughout their childhood. "Ich liebe dich auch," he replied.

Mello went out the door at last, softly closing it behind him, leaving Matt to sit slightly dumbfounded on the couch. He had finally come to see him after four years, and all he said was goodbye...

Matt could feel the tears come hot and fast now. Mello had only made things worse by giving him a small hope that he might come back. Now there was no chance...no chance... He angrily grabbed the glass cup sitting on the table and hurled it at the wall, the shattering glass ringing in his ears as he hugged his knees to his chest. The other boy had just left him alone, again...

Giving a sigh, coupled with a small sob, Matt reached for the remote and turned on the news. Hearing about tragedies in other people's lives always made him feel a little bit better about his own.

His face remained impassive as he listened to the familiar accounts of Kira, and heart attack victims. His interest wasn't even sparked when they announced that the news reporter, Kiyomi Takada, had been kidnapped by a stranger outside of NHN headquarters. Pretty much all the same stuff...

"..._Just in, we have received confirmation on Kiyomi Takada's whereabouts. It seems that her body was located in an semi parked in an abandoned building at Karuizawa, along with another male believed to be the kidnapper. Both were found dead on the scene..." _A picture of Kiyomi Takada flashed on the screen, and Matt sighed, his hand reaching for the remote. _"...the young man who had been driving has not yet been identified, but if you have any information as to who..." _They flashed another picture on the screen, and Matt felt his heart stop completely.

_"...this man might be, please contact the police force immediately..."_

Matt could feel his face drain of color as he stared at the picture on the screen, unsure of what his eyes were seeing. The remote slipped from his hand and he stood up from the couch, his legs shaking violently beneath him, threatening to collapse at any moment. "M-Mello..."

_But how...?_

He raced to the doorway and immediately flung the door open, practically tripping over himself as he ran out in the hallway. "M-Mello!"

The blond smiled at him from the opposite end of the hall, the sunlight from the window making him shine slightly and look all the more angelic. "Goodbye, Matt," he said softly, and slowly he turned and began to walk down the other hallway.

Reality suddenly hit Matt like a ton of bricks. "...n-no! Wait, Mello!" he immediately ran after the other boy, his heart pounding against his chest, and a dizzy feeling suddenly overcoming him. When he reached the end of the hallway, he braced himself against the wall and turned down the other corridor. "M-Mello!" he cried, his voice choked with the hot tears that were streaming down his face.

But he was gone.

He had said his final goodbye, all that was needed to allow him the sanctity of moving on.

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**Reviews? Pretty please, ne? :) **


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